Calm Down? Fuck Around and Find Out.
Telling someone with BPD to “calm down” is like telling a raccoon in a dumpster fire to “just breathe.” Babe, I am the raccoon. I am the fire. And I just found a half-melted Snickers bar of emotional instability. This post is a glitter-coated Molotov cocktail aimed directly at the phrase “calm down”—because when you say it, my brain doesn’t de-escalate. It escalates. Dramatically. Featuring sarcasm, spirals, and the kind of emotional intensity that could power a small city.
Split Happens, but I happen louder.
What Your Favorite Mighty Morphin Power Ranger Says About You
What Your Favorite Mighty Morphin Power Ranger Says About You Or: How childhood color-coded trauma shaped your adult coping mechanisms Let’s be honest. You didn’t just watch Mighty Morphin Power Rangers—you emotionally imprinted on one of them and built your entire personality around it. Whether you were crushing, projecting, or spiritually adopting their chaos, your […]
Favorite Person Syndrome: Like Heroin, But With More Crying in the Fridge
When your Favorite Person is your emotional oxygen, even a “k” text can trigger a full-blown spiral. This post dives into the chaos of FP dynamics with BPD—equal parts glitter, panic, and fridge-based crying.
MRI: Sensory Torture in a Fancy Tube
Let me set the scene: I’m lying in a glorified metal coffin while a machine screams at me in robot Morse code. The tech says, “Just relax.” I say, “I’m neurodivergent.” They say, “It’ll be over soon.” And that’s when I realize I’m about to be emotionally waterboarded by sound waves and […]
Feelings, But Make em’ Functional
Emotional regulation is a scam, and I’m here to make it sexy. If you’ve ever cried in a Target parking lot while Googling “coping skills for spicy brains,” congratulations—you’re my target audience. This isn’t a guide, it’s a glitter-covered meltdown map. We’re not fixing feelings here; we’re weaponizing them. Grab your flowchart, your sarcasm, and maybe a snack. It’s time to feel everything and still make it to your 2PM meeting like the emotionally unstable legend you are.